Perhaps We Need to Rethink Gay Marriage

Generally I am opposed to gay marriage. I suppose I believe in what ultimately can be understood as a natural order to things. Water finds the lowest spot. If a ball is thrown in the air it will fall to the ground. A man and a woman will have children if they persist in an intimate relationship, which creates a situation that is best resolved by the presence of both parents.

That is of course the practical side of my thinking. But we as a society evolve. Our cultural norms are guided through experience and often additionally for expedience.

My argument is not that same-sex marriage is an ideal partnership. It clearly is not. Because of the natural absence of the ability to procreate, the necessity to bond one man to another is far less pressing. A mere mutual understanding of faithfulness should suffice in a relationship that’s bond is solely love of one another.

But, we as conservatives have got to understand that there are consequences to actions. Our “action” to in the very least limit abortions, will if seen through, increase the number of unwanted pregnancies that as a matter of course will increase the number of unwanted children. That being an undeniable result of either the limitation of, or ideally, the elimination of abortion, we need to increase the number of two parent households in want of the unwanted. There are many couples willing to adopt, and as the system exists, there are difficulties in doing so not the least of which being cost and procedure. This is not to say that loosening standards is a first option. But allowing gays to commit to one another for life, will add to the stabilization of these same-sex unions. And while we may find in our hearts reservations regarding gay adoption, we should not prevent it. Allowing same-sex marriage will necessarily create far more two parent households.

Although blatantly anecdotal, it should be suffice to say that many man/woman relationships would crumble without the legal tangles of divorce which marriage creates. It is better for society to unite two people in a common interest. Establishing roots in a community for the sake of unity is beneficial for all. But more so than communal property, the benefit for children to be grounded by two loving individuals who would otherwise be shifting in and out of a system is incalculable. And while we know that gays are already adopting, the solidity of a stable partnership is essential, even if that partnership is less conventional.

We have to be willing as a conservative community to allow for some concessions when the benefit of those concessions out way the community perils of obstruction. If we oppose abortion, we should be willing to adopt. If we are not all willing to adopt, we should all be willing to create as many stable environments for those souls we save.